Across the Borders
by Hope- Suddenly I See
Summary: They were but innocent kits when they met, and through the Great Journey and beyond, their friendship only grew stronger and stronger... until it wasn't a friendship any longer, but something much, much more... FIN!
1. Why Is It Wrong?

I inhale deeply as to let her scent rest in my memory until our next meeting. Already, though I have just parted from her and stand possibly twenty fox-lengths from the Twoleg path where we met, I miss her terribly and feel a deep longing to fly into ShadowClan territory and pull apart the trees until I find her. She is so beautiful, so lovely; she is perfect. StarClan knows that I love her more than anything… and I can't describe how it feels to have heard her admit the same.

Her sleek-furred slender body had quivered as she had flown across the path as though on winged paws to fling herself onto me and bury her muzzle in my pelt. I remember the bittersweet thoughts that had occurred then. _She just misses me from the Great Journey,_ I had convinced myself, and I had managed to hold my tongue. While I was admiring her long, thick, tan and brown swirled fur with sprinklings of perfect white dots, and gazing into the exquisite emerald-green orbs that were her eyes, she had excitedly been telling me of her apprentice ceremony and her journey to the Moonpool, which she and her mentor, Smokefoot, had already made. In her fast-flowing monologue, I almost missed what she had said at the end.

"… _and, I don't know if you feel the same, and I _know_ this is wrong in about three ways... but I, um, want you to know that I sorta, um, love you." _She had stepped back anxiously, whiskers twitching in nervousness as she waited for my reply.

My eyes had flashed and I sank my muzzle into her fur in pure bliss. "I love you too…" And she had twined her tail lovingly with mine and we lay together beneath the stars for hours while we repeatedly murmured "I love you," in the most gentle, loving, perfect, blissful way I ever could have dreamed of.

StarClan knows that I fantasizied of that moment so many times... although she may be a ShadowClan apprentice, nothing can change my love for her and I never will stop. I told her so and her eyes sparkled with tears of joy that she could not cry. Her purr deepened and how I felt my love for her was unbearable. I want her to come running back, to cry my name out for the worlds to hear and to tell me that she loves me... but she is gone... I will see her again tomorrow night, I remind myself sharply as the sun rises still higher in the streaked sky.

My voice admitting "I love you too" still seems to echo around my ears and I would have sworn I caught a hint of her sweet scent on the wind. I twist around and resentfully begin to wash her beautiful, wildflower-drenched scent traces off my pelt.

Why must this be wrong? How can StarClan believe our love is impure, or some other pile of fox-dung, simply because she is a ShadowClan apprentice and I an apprentice from ThunderClan? I don't care! We will be together. I will never give up on her. She is mine. She loves me.. and I.. I...

_I love her. Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love…_

Feeling happier than I have ever felt possible, I race back to the camp and despite the fact that my paws are on earthly soil, I feel as though I walk with StarClan in a state of disembodied bliss.

**Eh... eh? Review, please:) Thank you everyone!!**

**Oh... and try to guess who the pair is!!**

**(Some probably already know :) )**


	2. What Love Is

My eyes flicker around the clearing as I search desperately for the certain tom of ThunderClan. I have missed everything about him from the moment we parted, and all I want is to see him again.

I think I love him.

_There!!_

I spot his gleaming gaze on me, and I smile dreamily as my eyes travel across his short tabby pelt. I want to run over to him and make him say that he loves me. Make him say it a thousand times. StarClan, I never knew I could feel this way. Just the sight of him sends shivers down my spine and makes every hair on my body bristle in anticipation.

_Antcipation?_

Why should I expect him to do anything for me? I, who turned him away when his feelings(?) for me were strongest; no, I said, "Not yet"; and truly I rue it. The apprentice, he has been able to do naught but whisper sweet nothings into my ear. He means nothing; he was only playing. Just like Oakpaw.

I want to turn away from that time about Oakpaw and move on. With him, I thought I had. Now I am having so many doubts. If I have lost him, it is truly my own fault.

Again his eyes meet mine. I wish I had cast my gaze downward; I do not deserve him; why should he love me? My mentor Smokefoot calls**. (a/n I made a mistake in the last chapter, she is a **_**warrior**_** apprentice, not a medicine cat) **I disregard this and instead dwell on the bolt of emotion that struck me when that cat met my wistful eyes. He only looked at me, and I at him, when_ bam_. It felt exactly as though an electric bolt had ripped through my fur and has left me standing here, motionless, unable to do anything but love a cat so strictly forbidden from me that it makes my heart ache. I can only love him, and love is the most painful thing I know of. That I shall ever know of. I want to shriek the truth across the clearing. _I love you!!_

Of course I knew this was love. Realization never needed to come; I only needed to accept my fate. Like I would honestly lie next to a cat from an enemy Clan and whisper 'I love you' into the night, over and over again, unless it was true. I may, technically, still be on the rebound from Oakpaw's cruel ways, but you are not a playtoy, or a joke. You are the desire of my heart. I remember the sweeping feel of your whiskers traveling over my fur and the feel of your body pressed against mine. We are still young, yet this must be real. You coming closer to me, the night still new, and an unasked question lingering in your eyes. "Not yet," I told you; so foolishly I told you… No doubt you love a ThunderClan cat and you only stayed the rest of the night to humor me. Oh, but I know I'm in love with you.

Blackstar, my leader, begins to report. Suddenly, the familiar scent that I love swirls around me and I feel a tap on my shoulder. I obediently follow him into the thick undergrowth.

_Weird. There are traces of super-stale scent in here. Leafpool and Crowfeather…?_

_Who cares? I'm with him again___

"You do feel the same as me, right?" His voice sounds desperate and I feel my heart melt.

"Of course I do."

"Good! I was worried for a moment there…" Beyond his voice I can hear the Clans moving around. The Gathering must be over.

"I think it's over."

He looks crestfallen. "Can we meet again somewhere? Like, meet me here in two sunrises at twilight." Hope sparkles in his eyes.

Like I said already, I've melted. Obviously I want to meet him. "Definitely. Go safely, my love."

_Whoa. Did I just say that?_

He loved hearing it. I can tell. "You too." He brushes his pointed muzzle across my cheek and whips away into the night, dissolving into a pack of his Clanmates. A twinge of sadness grows in my heart, but I force it down and slip into the mass that is my Clan, trying to act natural. Apparently I succeed, because no one says anything, so I sink into my thoughts.

_I only told myself it was sweet nothings. In case he too was only playing, so if he ever denied me I would be able to say, 'so?' _I will remember, Oakpaw. You're a fool if you think I won't._ Oakpaw too had claimed to love me but I didn't see his web of lies until it was far too late. He only wanted to love me secretly, which meant nothing. So when Ivypaw asked about us, he denied anything and everything… such pain I had never known._

_If that ThunderClan apprentice hadn't been there that day, by the Twoleg paths, I believe I would have jumped. Jumped, from much too high, to a certain death. But when I saw him, all my suicidal thoughts vanished. All that mattered was him. I was rewarded for it far too many times, simply by seeing his feelings shine in his eyes. _

_And I want him so badly it takes my breath away. _

_--------------------------------_

**Woah… sappy. But I still like it. **

**Everyone who guessed the cats' names was right, and this is the last 'anonymous' chapter I'm going to write. The rest will actually say their names, 'cause I think this is hard to follow. Thank you everyone for reviewing!! **

**from Aquastream**


	3. Like Whoa

**The pair was Birchpaw and Applepaw!! Congrats to everyone who guessed right ) and thank you to everyone who reviewed!**

----x----

My eyes flicker towards her. Silently, pawstep by pawstep placed deliberately upon the frozen mud, I crawl towards the ShadowClan she-cat. Playfully, I spring out of the bush directly behind her and leap on her back, claws sheathed. She _mrrows_ in surprise and mischievously bats at me with one delicate forepaw. Applepaw manages to twist me around, gently places one paw on my neck, and declares, "I think I win!" But she has forgotten the one move ThunderClan is known for. I heave upwards and throw her off. Suddenly I feel fearful, as I have flung her far into the clearing beyond the tree where we met.

We are on the Island, where our Clans gather for, well, a Gathering. But this night is graced by a three-quarters-moon, not a full moon. Applepaw and I met here alone. I race into the undergrowth where it is broken, presumably from her landing. She's taking a long time to come back. I scuffle about in the undergrowth, searching for a trace of that brown fur. All of the sudden she launches herself onto me, and I yelp in surprise. She overpowers me, and anyways I am tired of play-fighting. I need to talk to her instead of pretending to be in battle. "Applepaw, can we quit?" She clambers charitably off of me, flicking her tail over my nose with a smile. Surprisingly I am overpowered with a weird bolt of playful emotion. I throw myself onto her turned back and flip her over. Pinning her paws to the ground, I softly press her pelt into the ground. I touch my nose to hers and she purrs. I think about how hard Ashfur had me training today and suddenly I don't care. I'm with Applepaw, and we are the only two cats in the world. I love her, and I say so.

"Birchpaw, you know this is wrong."

"But… but I thought… Well, I don't know… I thought you wanted to see me." I say, feeling hurt. Somehow… oh, why didn't I see this coming?

"I do. I love you, Birchpaw. But how can we stay together, when everything we know goes against this?" She looks as though every word against our relationship is dragged out of her, while when she speaks of love her eyes fill with it and sparkle at me.

"I don't have the answer to that either, but can't we enjoy the time we have together?" I really want to stay together. Maybe she will come to ThunderClan or something; I'm not sure about that though. I wouldn't want to leave my Clan, even though our leader can be a goody-two-paws.

"Mouse-brain. Of course we can. I'm just being uptight. Sorry, Birchpaw." She murmurs.

I reply quickly, "Don't be sorry. Others might say no cat is perfect, but they don't know you like I do. You would have died for me on the Great Journey, and I would do the same for you now." A hint of sorrow creeps into my voice as I remember others that _did_ die on the Great Journey, and I shudder as I remember Marshpaw's near-freezing. Applepaw presses against me, and twines her tail with mine. I purr, and she pushes her muzzle into my neck. I soothingly sweep my long tail over her shoulder, and I step back rapidly as she growls at me. "You're just like Oakpaw! All you do is play with me. Playing, playing, never really loving me, although you say you do. What is with toms? I should beat you up for this! You just want me to be a traitor, don't you?"

_Like whoa, mood flash! _

She leaps on top of me and this time her claws are unsheathed. Out of the blue, I catch a whiff of a strange scent.

_Tigerstar?_ As though I've read Applepaw's mind, I understand what she's growing through. And her former leader, Tigerstar, must have come down from the Place-of-No-Stars to reinforce her mistrust of me. But how can I convince her?

She thinks I just want to make her fall for me, and then laugh. Which would destroy her Clan loyalty, and make her something Tigerstar despises. A traitor! And she believes what he must have whispered in her mind or something.

The scent of Tigerstar grows stronger, and I hear what must be his voice, a deep, unsettling rasp in my ear as though the dead tabby were standing next to me, whispering instructions into my ears.

"Kill her. She's just an apprentice. Why would you love a cat like this? She's only standing in your path to greatness, Birchpaw. Your father may have rejected me when I left ThunderClan, but I know true potential when I see it." Tigerstar ordered, malice in every pitch of his voice. And then someone flashes behind me.

Applepaw.

She must have climbed off of me while I was listening to Tigerstar. Another whirl of creamy brown fur flickers across my line of vision, and hurls its muscular body over my small frame. Her capable claws rake through my short pelt and her thorn-sharp teeth mesh into my ear. Anger flows through me, but it is directed not at Applepaw. Tigerstar did this. "I won't fight you, Applepaw."

"You're just scared!" The voice issues out from her mouth, but it is Tigerstar's rasp, and his scent floods my mouth instead of Applepaw's. Her pretty emerald eyes burn amber.

"Tigerstar's controlling you!" I shriek, forgetting the need to keep silent. "Applepaw, you told me you love me! _This isn't you_!!" The hatred in her eyes grows fiercer, and one last thing rolls from her jaws. I hate what Tigerstar has done to Applepaw. "Tell Dustpelt I will haunt _every last one_ of his kits until he _rues_ the day he denied me." A tremor runs through my and Applepaw's bodies at the same time, and I want to collapse just when she does. All the strength seems to be gone from her, and I tenderly lick her eyelids. "I knew it couldn't be you. You pledged to love me," I whisper softly into her pointed ear.

----x----

Her eyelashes are fluttering. I blink, and her emerald orbs are staring into what feels like my very soul, the core of my being, to the place where my love for her comes from. I nose her gently, and she stirs again. Applepaw stands up and says, "Birchpaw, I didn't hurt you, did I?"

Actually, now that she mentions it, my scratches begin to sting, but I say, "No, I'm fine."

"Good, because-" strength seems to pour into her bones "- we need to finish that play-fight." She coyly blinks at me, and I feel my heart twist. _This she-cat has a serious hold over me._

"Fine, I'll start," I answer. I soar through the air and land right on my target – Applepaw's back. I smirk and lightly batter her back with half-kicks and pretend to claw at her sides. Without warning, I tense up and use my legs to roll her over. I balance on top of her, smiling, and ask that question again, still without words. Everything in me feels as though it is boiling. Oh, chemicals certainly react. I am so far in love. Like, whoa. This feeling is like a passion; she is my infatuation. This time, she utters a different reply to my unasked question.

"Up to you."

I flash a grateful look at her, full of affection for Applepaw, and say, "Hold on a moment." I dash up to the tree-bridge. Not a cat was near, nor did I see any prey. I return to her, and am glad no one is near, for no one can know.

----x----

**Review? Pleasey? Thank you! )**

**Yay for weirdo cliffys.**


	4. Dignity

My head feels as though it is full of stars. My paws feel as light as air! I believe that right now, for me to stay alive, it is not even necessary for me to breathe. I'm racing away from the Island, away from him, but still Birchpaw's amazing face stays firmly imprinted in what seems to be my one-track mind. Just as quickly, my mind snaps back into focus.

_Hunt. I need to hunt. Blackstar or Russetfur or _someone_ is sure to have noticed my absence by now._ I reprimand myself.

A squirrel with a bright red bushy tail is perched in a birch tree right in front of me. The thing must've been quite dumb, because it practically leaps into my paws. But if the squirrel was dumb, I am nothing compared to it, for I was too busy thinking 'birch tree' to even grab at the squirrel. I am ashamed of myself. I sink my claws deep into the muddy ground and rub my face firmly against the tree, hoping for my actions to wake me up. They have no effect whatsoever on me. Angrily I tear deeper into the forest, only to stop soon, stunned beyond words.

The purely-white pelt of my greatest enemy, Snowpaw, stands accusingly in front of me.

_foxdung!!_

I squirm guilty under her knowing stare. I /know/ I still smell of Birchpaw.

Crap, crap, crap. (a/n sorry if that offends you)

"Soooo." Snowpaw says irritatingly. "/This/ is where you've been going all these nights."

StarClan. I refuse to look up into what I know would be her accusing blue eyes, sparkling in triumph at last. I growl under my breath.

"Oh no you did NOT just growl at me!" Snowpaw shrieks. She stalks up to me, forces her finely pointed muzzle under my tortoiseshell chin, and wrenches my head upwards, so that I must meet her eyes. I do so sulkily. Snowpaw isn't pleased…

She pushes me over, pins me to the ground, and shoves her face into my space. She growls with pure menace in her voice. "You are going to get Smokepaw to like me OR ELSE."

/Great…/ Smokepaw is a tom that is infatuated with me, if possible even more so than Birchpaw. But since I /have/ Birchpaw, I couldn't care less about Smokepaw. He is quite handsome, and a fine cat. Very respectable. But I feel absolutely nothing for him. And he doesn't like Snowpaw.

_Oh StarClan. They might as well exile me now_. I will at least try to keep my dignity, though. So aloud I mew, "I swear that I will do my best for you, Snowpaw." And with that disgusting little sentence out of my mouth, I whirl off to hunt. My life, just moments before so perfect, is going down in flames.


	5. Cry

**Everyone who reads this chapter, I'm really asking you to go vote on my poll. I need to find out the results of the poll so that I can decide on Birchpaw's warrior name. I must say that I abhor Birchfall. I'll try to write one more chapter with him as an apprentice but if I don't get enough votes, it won't be up anytime soon. I really want to know what to call him. I like Birchfeather and Birchfrost the best, but don't change your vote for me. Applepaw's warrior name is already decided. (and in this chapter.) I love it, my friend hates it. I dunno how you will take it. Why not review and say? -wink wink nudge nudge-**

**Rubyrose1 - yes, that's exactly right.**

**Gemia - Thank you!**

**Gladewing - I know. Snowpaw is a jerk:D Nah, she just likes Smokepaw and hates Applepaw. Wait... same difference.**

-Birchpaw's POV-

Blissfully I lay in the sun's rays. Whitepaw is uncomfortably close to me, but I won't move and disturb her – she's sleeping. I think in the back of my mind about Applepaw, whom I haven't seen in what feels like moons, but then scold myself inwardly.

Why can't she be ThunderClan????

The Gathering is tonight and I am hoping with all my heart, mind, and soul that both of us will get to go. And by both, I don't mean Whitepaw and I. Even though she seems to think of us that way. But I know she's got Spiderleg on her trail, and seeing as she's going to be made a warrior tonight – shh, it's a secret – I think that Spiderleg might get his fondest dream to come true.

I know mine already has.

-x-

It is near sundown, and Firestar has called the Clan together so that he can give Whitepaw her warrior name.

"Whitepaw, will you please step forward," Firestar requests. Her snowy white pelt is gleaming in the little light. There is no question that she is beautiful, but I don't feel anything for her. Just as those thoughts cross my mind, she turns around and indulgently smiles at me, as if to say, 'It's alright, Birchpaw. Don't feel left out. You'll be with me soon.' Her startling green eyes lock onto Spiderleg's; he is gazing at her with such longing that I find it hard to believe that she can't tell he loves her.

"Brackenfur, are you satisfied that Whitepaw is ready to become an apprentice?"**(a/n: Gladewing it's funny that both of us are writing about Brackenfur's apprentices in the same day:D)**

Brackenfur's reply is strong and sure. "Yes, Firestar," he meows with conviction ringing from his voice.

"Then I, Firestar, leader of ThunderClan, call upon my warrior ancestors to look down on this apprentice. She has trained hard to learn the ways of your noble code, and I commend her to you in her turn. Whitepaw, do you promise to uphold the warrior code and to defend this Clan at the cost of your life?"

Whitepaw's voice is thick with emotion. "Yes, I do," she mews. Her throat sounds choked.

"Then, by the powers of StarClan, I give you your warrior name. From this moment you will be known as Whiteflower. StarClan honors your loyalty and your courage, and we welcome you as a full warrior of ThunderClan," Firestar finished, sounding solemn but certain. He steps forward to rest his muzzle on Whiteflower's head, and she flicks out her vivid pink tongue to lick his shoulder.

The Clan begins to chant. "White-flow-er! White-flow-er!" She looks thrilled as she raced back towards me. Whiteflower presses her pink nose to my cheek, and whispers in my ear, "Birchpaw, I'll wait for you."

_Greatttttt_.

Spiderleg is staring enviously at me, because now that crazy she-cat is excitedly twining her tail into mine and pulling me really close. I take two steps backwards. "Whitepa-flower, I'm sorry but I-"

"Tell me tomorrow, Birchpaw. Don't worry, I'll still spend all my free time with you."

Like I said before, greatttttt.

-x-

Blackstar is balanced on the tree's lowest branch, addressing the Clans. It irritates me that he didn't even speak to any cat when he arrived, just leapt onto the branch and yowled for the meeting to start. I didn't even get half a chance to see if Applepaw is here.

"Cats of all Clans, gather 'round for the meeting to begin!" he shrieks.

Sandstorm, (Firestar of course), Brambleclaw, Whiteflower, Thornclaw and I are all here. Sandstorm who's to my right is looking up at Blackstar like he's crazy.

Which, of course, he is.

Whiteflower's seated close by me, to my left. Firestar jumps a branch down and meows something into Blackstar's ear. Blackstar looks at Firestar like he wants to take a large chunk out of Firestar's throat. I rise halfway to my paws and seriously start to look for Applepaw. We agreed before that if we both came to the Gathering, we'd purposely get left behind, so we could be together. Whiteflower asks me, "Who ya lookin' for?" in this tone that seriously irks me. She's not my mate, and not my mom, so she can back off for once!

_Applepaw obviously._

I respond nonchalantly. "No one in particular, just checking out who's here." Okay, so maybe there was a slight – okay obvious – edge to my voice. But she should be able to tell that Spiderleg's the one who likes her, not me!

Blackstar still voices his news first. "ShadowClan is thriving." _Big whoop._ "Tawnypelt has had a litter of kits. They are called Flamekit, Dawnkit, and Tigerkit!" **(a/n yeah I seriously messed up the time scale. But I did it on purpose.) "**We also have made two apprentices warriors! Snowpaw has become Snowstep, and Applepaw's new name-"

_Oh my StarClan. Applepaw's a warrior. _

"- is Applenose!" A large circle clears itself around Snowstep and Applenose. I bound forward. I don't even care if it's obvious. Applenose looks stunning. Absolutely gorgeous. Snowstep looks identical to Whiteflower. I'm not interested in her much though. My eyes are firmly fixed on Applenose, and I don't want to look away.

"Snowstep is expecting kits and will soon move to the nursery," Blackstar continues. Snowstep doesn't exactly look happy about it, which is really odd. Toadpaw looks at her fondly, and I wonder if he might be the father. Snowstep doesn't return Toadpaw's smile – instead, she is staring at Smokepaw with intense longing. Ooooh, she likes him but Applenose told me Smokepaw liked her(Applenose). Love square thingy, anyone?

Weird. If the father was Toadpaw… He was always so hard to please.

Firestar spoke next: "ThunderClan too is doing well. We are slightly short of apprentices but Daisy's kits will be apprenticed soon. We also have made a new warrior. Whitepaw has been renamed Whiteflower. That is all ThunderClan has to say."

Whiteflower is purring extremely loudly and twining her tail with mine so hard that it hurts. Everyone is watching us. Including Applenose, who, so happy only seconds before, looks like she might have an emotional breakdown. I widen my eyes at her and curl my lip at Whiteflower – everyone else had looked away, but Applenose still stares at us. Hurt crawls all over her face. I cannot bear to go on looking.

All the curses of HeckClan are boiling in my head and I am just itching to spit them all in Whiteflower's face. But instead I wrench my tail away from her death grip and wrap it firmly around my own paws. Whiteflower looks like she too might cry.

Crying she-cats suck.

---

Is it good? I was pushing for inspiration. And yeah, I'm going to mess up the timeline quite a bit and apprentice Daisy's kits in the next couple chapters. I'd love reviews! Please and thank you.

(z)--Aquasteam


	6. Roses

**Chapter 6**

**LOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOLLOL :D :D :D**

**Did anyone else see that at the end of last chapter I signed it AquaSTEAM!? LOL!!!!**

**Sorry, that was RANDOM. I'm really, really hyper.**

**Niah-Miyoki - Sorry you don't like the name Applenose, but I'm keeping it :) Glad you like Whiteflower's name though!**

**Gladewing - I like the name Applefall. And thanks (for voting and reviewing)**

**Mapleleaf - Thank you, and I like your name too. **

**Yalith's wolf - LOLOLOL, you made me die laughing again. Thank you so much!**

**Gemia - Thanks, and sorry for the wait!**

**Qzil - Thanks, and the screwy timestream is because I'm making Birchpaw a warrior in the chapter after this, and ThunderClan and ShadowClan could both use more young cats.**

**Musicgoddess618 - Yep. Thanks for reviewing :)**

**Story now: Chapter Six**

**---- This has some song lyrics in it, which I wrote about my crush when he was with this other girl that he likes instead of me**

**(Applenose's POV first. )**

Why? Why? Why does he have to be with her? Whiteflower… I think I'd rather call her White-freaking-loser. Why did she steal my Birchpaw, my darling Birchpaw! I wanted to share this victory with him, he who I gave up everything for, and… and… and

And he's got a new mate?

Oh, and never mind the fact that I think I might be expecting kits, which would certainly be his.

_Oh, don't mind me / I'll just stand here_

_Stand here and pretend / It doesn't hurt me_

_To see you with her / That girl I could be_

_What the heck / It's not like she's funny_

_Go get a brain check and realize / that you really like me_

_Cause this is just what / I don't need_

Tears burn hot at the corner of my eyes. I'm biting my lip to keep from yowling out loud. I want Birchpaw. Why should she get him?

Someone pushes me roughly. I turn to my left and see Snowstep sitting primly with her black lips sealed together. Her sapphire eyes are waiting for my head to turn her way, and as soon as I do her lips part.

"I want Smokepaw and I want him by moonhigh tomorrow." She orders. "Or I'll tell everyone about you and Birchpaw."

_Oh StarClan_.

The Gathering ends after Leopardstar says something about Hawksomeone, and Blacksomething driving away a badger. It's not like I'm listening. I was supposed to stay after and talk to Birchpaw, but I don't know if I'll do that now. I mean, he's got White-freaking-loser…

Brown tabby pelt flashes in my peripheral vision. I turn to face Birchpaw. RiverClan is filing away. "Where's Whitewhatever?" I snidely say. My heart's nowhere near in the taunt though, and he sees straight through me in an instant. He bundles me back against the branches of a willow tree, and I don't resist. What can I say? All I want is the feel of his fur on mine and his voice whispering to me and his tongue licking my pelt so softly…

All I want is him.

ThunderClan is filing out. Birchpaw watches their departure with worry in his eyes, and I cast mine to the ground. Once the last members of WindClan have left the fallen tree-bridge, he turns to me. Worry still glistens in his amber eyes. He reaches up to nuzzle my neck, but just as he does so a white shape flashes across the ground nearest the tree-bridge.

It's Whiteloser. She's come back for my Birchpaw.

He sees the alarm in my eyes and pushes me further backwards into a bush. A bramble bush. "Stay here," he orders me firmly. "I swear I'll come back."

Birchpaw tears towards the white warrior queen, touches noses with her, and tells her something. Hot wetness streams down my cheeks. The tears have come, and they streak through my pelt, getting it all salty. I do my best to sob quietly and take my pink tongue to my scratches. Birchpaw didn't even realize that he hurt me when he pushed me in here, but two of my legs are bleeding and my neck is scratched. The blood too is salty and tastes metallic on my tongue. I want to retch. I want to curl up and die. Birchpaw is still with Whiteflower… Rage takes over my mind. I want to see him suffer for what he's done to me. I unsheathe my claws and creep towards the Great Tree. Claw-length by claw-length, I make my way up the tree. Once I stand far high enough to die if I jump, I look down again. Birchpaw is spitting something at Whiteflower.

Her ears flatten and she looks as though he's swiped at her. She turns around and pelts away from him. Birchpaw dashes back to where he left me, and I can see the fear in his eyes even from up here.

"Oh, Birchpaw," I call tauntingly to him. "Up heeeeerrreee."

His amber eyes look as though they're going to pop out of his head. "Don't do it, Applenose! I love you! You can't jump! Whiteflower means nothing… nothing to you…" His voice trails off in a low yowl.

"Well, you'd have to prove it to me that you love me if you want me to come down," I yell.

"I'll do anything. Just come down!" He cries desperately. I slowly begin to re-sink my claws into the bark of the tree, feeling my way back down. Once my paws hit the sandy ground, Birchpaw hurls himself at me and licks all over my pelt. He tastes the saltiness quickly and asks, "Were you crying?" I nod miserably.

"I thought you loved Whiteflower. I thought she was your new mate."

His eyes widen in disgust. "Never," he reassures me. His tail wraps itself around me and draws me closer to him. I resist for more than a moment. I pull away and turn to face him. "Don't try telling me you like me or love me at the moment. You'd have to prove it." I challenge him.

"What do you want me to do?" he asks me.

_Fun stuffs._ "Run around the Island four times, jump in the lake, catch me a fish, and then the last thing can be a surprise." I tell him smugly.

He takes off darting his way around the heavily wooded Island. Within five minutes he's busy slogging his way back to me; he's already jumped into the lake. I follow him as he runs to the widest stream and sits with his paw poised above the water. Silver flashes and he's struck. A squiggling fish is in his mouth. He chomps on it hard until it stops moving, and lays it at my paws.

"Now for the last thing," he reminds me, and darts off again.

I follow him cautiously, but before I can go more than two fox-lengths, he's there. He was waiting. "NO FOLLOWING!" He tells me mock-sternly. I giggle and sit down, wrapping my tail around my white-tipped paws.

When he returns, he has a long-stemmed flower in his mouth. A beautiful hot-pink rose that is fully blossomed. He gently transfers it into my mouth, and asks me, "Are you happy now?"

I nod. I'm overwhelmed. I rub my face against his flank and settle down onto my stomach, still breathing in the sweet fragrance of the rose.

"Applenose, I really do love you, you know."

_Oh, Birchpaw, I know._

**---**

**Ok that was sappy. But ya know Applenose's got good reason to need good reason before she'll re-accept Birchpaw.**

**If you know what I mean, which I'm pretty sure you don't.**

**x--Rainfeather's Hope**


	7. Why Can't It Be Simple?

**Sorry to all that this took so long. I never officially put it on hiatus, but it kind-of was. I was working on For Real - if you haven't read it, that's my most popular story! I love it! I'm trying to think of a good ending for this.**

**Niah-Miyoki - "Sappy is like, loveleh." Yeah, and it's fun to write. **

**Qzil - Yeah, if I ever get a chance, I'll make guys jump in lakes. It sounds hilarious. **

**Fluffylover666 - haha. Okay, here's the update. Thanks for the fave:)**

**Lightkit - I love the name Birchleaf. Are you the Lightkit registered on Fanfiction?**

**Yalith's wolf - JW, what does your PenName mean? Oh, and thanks for the funneh review.**

**HCSBFovever - oops, this took forever. Thanks for the fave :)**

**Stardawn - wicked name. I didn't describe Applenose much before I went full-on into Birchpaw loving her, I know. Thank you for the compliment :D**

**Grassy Leaves - Haha. Your suggestion kept this story running, I was going to put it on a very long hiatus when I got your ideas. Thank you! **

**Violently long Author's Note. Why did I say violent? Weird. I got my I.D. for going to Washington D.C. awhile ago, but I'm just warning everyone that I'll be gone in the first week of April. I won't be dead though.**

Across the Borders, Chapter 7

**by**: _rainfeather's hope_

(birchpaw's pov)

I pad softly along the lakeshore, praying that no cat notices me slipping home. I'm right at the edge of ThunderClan territory - I might as well go hunting for some prey. Maybe it'll keep Ashfur off my back about my disappearance. 

I scent squirrel soon after I enter the foliage of our familiar forest. My claws slide out as I think of sinking my teeth into its scrawny neck. The russet-colored prey is perched on a branch just over my head, scrabbling at a nut. An acorn, I think. As I watch, it removes the shell from the rest of the nut and drops it onto my head. I growl and hurl myself upwards after the acorn-dropping little bugger. But before I can snag my claws into its annoying tail, a rank scent sweeps over me. _Badger!_

The squirrel loses my attention and scuttles away quickly. I guess it too realizes something isn't right here. I turn this way and that, trying to decide which direction the badger is from me. I've just about pinpointed it when a wide paw slams down onto my head. Stars swim hazily in front of my eyes. Strangely enough, there is little pain. Without a thought I claw for its eyes. To my surprise I feel my claw pierce something soft. The badger howls and thrashes around, obviously in pain. Its wide paws catch my gray flank and throw me into thornbushes. Already dazed, I try to stand back up. I've got to drive this foul beast away. By the time I manage to get to my feet, it's lumbering away in the other direction clumsily. I can't say that I mind the fact that it's heading for ShadowClan.

_Wait - ShadowClan! Applenose!_

The second this crosses my mind, a she-cat shrieks in pure terror. I want to flee, but I know what I must do. Even if the cat isn't Applenose, I've got to save her. My paws seem to grow wings as I hurtle for the border. I spot the brute leaning over Snowstep, the new warrior queen who is pregnant. 

Time seems to slow down as I recognize the cat hanging from the badger's jaws. A limp tortoiseshell coat and green eyes. _Applenose. _"Not my she-cat, you devil!" I yowl, crashing into the badger like a runaway train. It doesn't seem to recognize me. Snowstep hobbles a few steps unsteadily toward me; I push her with my nose and order her to go to her camp. She looks as though she wants to argue with me - after all, I'm only an apprentice - but she closes her mouth, nods briefly, and flees the place, casting one horrified glance backwards. 

I bowl into the creature, trying not to choke as I inhale the vile scent. "Let. Go. Of my Applenose!" The first words I spit at it were a whisper, but I shriek the last part for all of StarClan to hear. I rake at its hindlegs until the badger drops Applenose from his mouth and swings another paw at me again. I cry my fiercest enemy yowl and battle it fiercely, but I'm no match for the seasoned, old male. It gashes my throat and I feel warm blood trickle into my pelt. The next minute flies by, and though I've given it a huge weal on its flank and two scratches across his nose, I have twice the number of injuries. Another blow, this time to my chest, weakens me further. I fly across the border into ShadowClan territory. Applenose is struggling up. I touch my nose quickly to hers and together we fly into battle, 

_At least we'll die together._

The badger lifts me this time into its teeth. Pointy, thorn-sharp; pain shrieks through me. I expect StarClan's glitter to appear at any moment. I expect my brother, Shrewpaw, to say, 'Birchpaw, come to us.'

Instead, Firestar's yowl rips through the trees. I fall limp in amazed disbelief. A fresh patrol of ThunderClan warriors streams down to where Applenose still fights the badger. My mentor, Ashfur, Firestar, Cloudtail, and Spiderleg tear like a load of angry bees into the fight. The badger's small, beady eyes try to take in all the foes and widen. Within a few heartbeats, it has dropped me and is running away, crashing through the forest.

"Whoa, thanks guys. For a few minutes there I thought I was fresh-kill." I say.

Ashfur doesn't speak, but noses me all over to check my injuries. I squirm away from his nose and bump into Applenose. She looks awkward. "Um, everyone, this is Applenose. She's ShadowClan." I meow slowly.

Firestar scrutinizes us. I am very, very aware of his gaze on us and make sure that we aren't touching at all. Which we had been, until he started staring.

"All right, little brother, let's get back to camp before you die of injuries," Spiderleg orders good-naturedly.

Firestar agrees and collects his patrol with a sweep of his tail. I whisper a quick word of farewell to Applenose and follow them back to camp.

-x-x-

"I, Firestar, leader of ThunderClan, call upon our warrior ancestors to look down upon this apprentice. He has fought bravely in the battle against the badger, and is ready to become a warrior. I commend him to you as a warrior in his turn. Birchpaw, do you promise to uphold the warrior code and to protect and defend this Clan, even at the cost of your life?"

I can't believe this is finally happening. "I do," I mew, striving to keep my voice level. Ferncloud is staring proudly at me, and Whiteflower is pressing against my side just a tiny bit too enthusiastically. Ah well.

Firestar stares at me challengingly. The blaze in his olive eyes takes me aback for a second, and then I realize he's guessed about Applenose and me. So why is he making me a warrior? 

"Then by the powers of StarClan I give you your warrior name. Birchpaw, from this day forth you will be known as Birchfeather. We welcome you as a full warrior of ThunderClan." His voice catches a little, as though he isn't positive he should be doing this. He rests his muzzle on my head; I feel his eyes staring beadily down at me all the while. Struggling to quell my rising anger, I lick his shoulder. Cats behind me are chanting. 

"Birch-fea-ther! Birch-fea-ther!" I turn around and embarrassedly purr. 

"Now we can be together!" Whiteflower's delighted purr is even louder than my own, which admittedly falters, although very slightly, at her idea. Still, I try to keep up my idea of happiness. "Birchfeather, I love your name!" she cries.

"Me too," I say, a bit prideful. "But I've got to keep vigil tonight." I remind her.

Her face falls for a second, but then it brightens. "Well we can go hunting tomorrow then!"

"I'd like that, Whiteflower." As I say it, I realize that's the truth. "Definitely."

Her smile tells me everything I need to know. But then I think of Applenose, and feel torn. 

_Why can't it be simple?_

_**--x--**_

**Augh. Short. Review, please, thanks.**

**--Rainey**


	8. Surprise & Orders

This chapter presented by… RAiNEY'S BOREDOM

**This chapter presented by… RAiNEY'S BOREDOM!!**

**CrystalheartXxX -why yes, he does… now who will he choose? I **_**don't know**_**!! Oh wait, yes I do, cause I'm the author… muahahaha!! I'm on a sugar high!!**

**Qzil - thankee. An' yea, it's a love TRISQANGLE!! Ohmegee, that's a fun word. Trisquangle trisquangle trisquang…**

**Evershine of FrostClan - Thanks :)**

**Gladewing - -koff- haha. I was gonna kill Birch in this, but I changed the plot drastically tis good morning. LAWL. **

Across the Borders, Chapter 8

**by**: _rainfeather's hope_

_(one moon later)_

"So, Snowstep, whose kits are they?" I ask her with a smile. _Please be Smokestream's._ She's really warmed up to me lately.

She steps closer to me in a friendly fashion, but worry hovers around her face. "Swear that you won't tell."

I hold up my white paw. "I swear to StarClan."

Snowstep whispers, "I'm not sure," in an agonized kind of way.

"What?!" My voice escapes me in an outraged squeak.

"Well," Snowstep begins, casting a nervous glance around. We're out in the forest, collecting herbs for Littlecloud. "When we were still apprentices, Toadpaw asked me to mate with him. I told him no, but he kept asking me until I said okay just to shut him up. He was thrilled until I was assigned to a hunting patrol that night. And the next day, I avoided him, and kept away from him. So one night I was out hunting, alone, and he jumped me. I wasn't expecting it, so I fought and clawed him. He took some kind of demented enjoyment out of that though. It was awful, Applenose…"

I can hardly believe it. _My own brother!_ The borage falls from my open mouth. "Did Blackstar order that? You know, like he sometimes does…"

"No. No, Toadpaw just… wanted me to like him I guess. Anyway it was so horrible. I had to tell some cat, and Smokestream was the first cat I saw that I knew I could trust. So I told him, and he totally understood. We really warmed up to each other, and we're mates now, but Toadpaw doesn't know. And I'm afraid if he finds out he'll hurt my kits somehow!" Her last words were a whimper.

"Oh StarClan, Snowstep!" is all that I can manage.

"I know," she mews.

Smokestream materialized beside us. "Did you tell her?" he asks of Snowstep. She replies with a barely discernable nod. Smokestream winds around her and begins to gently lead her back to the nursery. _I hope she's okay…_

-x-

At sundown I'm supposed to meet Birchfeather. We agreed upon the fallen maple tree just beyond both of our territories. If I want to be there on time, I'd better head out soon.

Oakfur stops me as I head for the entrance. "Applenose, can I talk to you?" He asks.

"Yeah, sure," I reply, holding back a sigh.

"First is, Russetfur has assigned you to sunhigh patrol tomorrow. Second, Blackstar wants you in his den. He's going to tell you about… about something important." Oakfur's eyes travel over me slowly, waiting for my response.

_Birchfeather, forgive me._ I dip my head a trot over to Blackstar's den. As I enter I easily pick out his gleaming white pelt, obvious in the gloom. His blue eyes are harder to pick out, but they gleam at me in an interested sort of way. "Greetings, Applenose. I need to discuss something important with you."

_What's so important?_

"As you should know, your brothers Marshpaw and Toadpaw will be made warriors alongside Ivypaw tomorrow. Flamekit, Dawnkit, and Tigerkit are one moon old, and Snowstep is expecting." He pauses, waiting for me to say something, but I don't understand. He continues: "We are very short of young cats at the moment. Snowstep is expecting, as I said, but Littlecloud thinks she'll only have one or maybe two small kits. And four kits isn't enough young cats for the Clan."

_Oh StarClan, please no._

"You are going to take Oakfur for your mate. He has agreed to this, and I want you to have a litter of kits for ShadowClan. Do you understand?" He fixes me with an icy stare.

My eyes fly open. _What about Birchfeather?_ But I know there is no arguing with Blackstar when he's made up his mind. Dumbly I nod my head. "You are to meet at the Twoleg nest. Go now," he orders, rising to his black paws. I dip my head, still stunned from what I have to do, and tear out of camp.

_Great StarClan, can things get any worse?_

**I know it's short, but it's important and short. Opinions pleazeeeee :)**

**--Rainey/ **


	9. Little White Lie

Qzil - lol, and thankee for the fave :) I hope he gets hit by a train too

**Qzil - lol, and thankee for the fave :) I hope he gets hit by a train too.**

**Niah-Miyoki - shh!! Haha, maybeeeee…**

**Evershine of FrostClan - also lol. Yay Brits! I hate bloody Blackstar! -is proud of self- and also, thankee!**

**Leopardmask - Thanks! Here's the update you wanted.**

Across the Borders, Chapter 9

**by**: _rainfeather's hope_

--(birchfeather's pov)

Whiteflower had wanted to come with me. I was supposed to meet Applenose here at sundown. I race into the clearing, searching for the sight of a pretty tortoiseshell with the scent of wildflowers. Applenose isn't here yet. I sit down on the fallen maple and conjure up an image of Applenose's face. She's gorgeous, and even better, she's mine. I'll wait for her, as long as it takes.

-x-

Twilight has fallen. The birds have become silent one by one. The wind has even died down. Dead silence that leaves my ears ringing, ringing with Applenose's words the last time I saw her:

"_Let's meet at sundown. At the fallen maple - It's so pretty in leaf-fall."_

Yeah, well!? I should've stayed with Whiteflower!

"Stupid she-cats! StarClan!" I yowl, cursing and spitting and scoring my claws into tree bark.

_You're only so mad because you're hurt._

"Shut up, voice!" I screeched, not caring if I appeared stark raving mad.

_Birchfeather, _think,_ will you? Applenose must have a reason for not showing up. Maybe she couldn't get away, maybe she was assigned to a patrol - _

"But she stood me up," I whine. There's no response from the more sensible half of me. My anger drains away to where I just want to curl up and die. So I collapse onto the crinkly, dry leaves, staring up at the star-swathed sky. "I feel so alon," I hear myself say again and again.

_Why isn't Applenose here?_

My voice gives out, and I fall asleep from pure exhaustion.

-x-

When I wake up, I'm in a glittering field. The shining grass make me want to romp around and play like a four moon old kit. But before I can do so, starry-furred spirits surround me.

_StarClan! Am I dead?_

"You are not dead, Birchfeather." A silvery-blue she-cat that is simply majestic in her shimmery glory is speaking.

"Bluestar!" I cry, licking her shoulder and bowing my head in the deepest respect.

She pulls away, her eyes like flint fire chips. "It's too late for that now, Birchfeather. You and Applenose are planning to break the warrior code, and for that you _will_ be punished." She says menacingly. I cower beneath her paws. "Go now." So much force is put behind the words that I fear they could shatter me into pieces as they echo around my head.

I wake up, panting for breath. It's near midnight.

_This _is the StarClan that every cat worships so?

I think I understand where Cloudtail comes from now. But what will happen to Applenose and I?

I can't ponder on that too long or I will drive myself simply insane. Before I can even begin to theorize, I find my paws taking me back to camp. Firestar will be furious when he finds out that I fell asleep away from camp, but my mind is too blank to begin churning out excuses. When I stumble upon Whiteflower, asleep, alone, by a stream near WindClan territory, I wake her with a twitch of my tail. "I fell asleep out of camp too," I admit. I'm ready to take whatever punishment Firestar can throw my way; but Whiteflower has different ideas.

"Let's say we were… you know, having _alone time?_" She proposes suggestively.

"We don't smell like each other," is all I can come up with. I'm trying halfheartedly to shoot down her theory. It's actually a good one.

Whiteflower starts to remedy that issue by rubbing her cheek along mine. The tingle I get from it feels really good, but like I'd ever admit that. I stiffly press my pelt into her fur. "Well you know if we're going to claim that we'll have to act like mates," she complains impatiently. "We could be," she adds in a much softer voice.

I can't deny that I have deep-rooted feelings for Whiteflower, but since I like Applenose I try to keep them in check.

_Maybe… well, Applenose and I were only mates once, when we were apprentices. If I take Whiteflower maybe StarClan would see that s repentance. It doesn't hurt that she's bright, talented, and just as pretty as Applenose._

"Maybe we should be," I answer her. Her eyes light up with unspoken surprise. "I'm sorry," I mew. She touches her muzzle to mine.

"Don't mention it, Birchfeather. I'd always forgive you. I love you." Whiteflower's voice is a mere whisper.

_What am I doing? _"I love you too." I tell her. A lie. A little _white_ lie. But maybe StarClan will forgive Applenose and I. And in the meanwhile, I can have Whiteflower. Right?

-x-

After a _long_ night with Whiteflower, I wake up to chattering birds.

_Oh StarClan, what did we _do

Hey, at least our alibi is true; the disgusting part of me comes up with.

Whiteflower's awake; she looks at me once and I'm trapped. What can I say? So I try to explain: "Whiteflower, last night we really… we were out of control - I didn't know what I was doing-" She brushes her tail over my mouth to quiet my rambling.

"Last night was _amazing._ I thought that you didn't feel for me in that way, but I was wrong! And I'm so happy… just so happy…" Whiteflower trails off, looking to meet my eyes. Just a little too late, I purr. She seems to accept that, and twines her tail with mine.

We get up and walk to the camp together. While others ask where we were and Whiteflower covers for me, I think of how I'm going back to that maple tree tonight. I shouldn't've done that with Whiteflower.

I don't care what StarClan says. I want Applenose and Whiteflower to be mine. Maybe I can have both she-cats - but if not, I'll pick Applenose, any season of the year!

**Dun dun dun DUN!!**

**I have almost the entire story written out by hand, but typing it will take a **_**long **_**time. R&R, please and thankies.**

**--Rainey**


	10. Across the Borders

This line is going to repeat and IDK why

**This line is going to repeat and IDK why**

**Ghostpelt - thankee for the fave! And maybeeee…/./I'm going to try to update Flickering Truths too…**

Across the Borders, Chapter 10

**by**:_ rainfeather's hope_

--(applenose's pov)

Last night was _awful_. I haven't told Snowstep, for fear that she'd go crazy with all the layers of her problem and mine. I think I'm about to lose it myself.

My brothers and Ivylight now are warriors. Marshpaw became Marshtail and Toadheart still follows Snowstep everywhere, much to her displeasure. I feel bad for both of them.

But back to last night - or maybe just Oakfur in general. I _knew_ I had to let Oakfur do that or face exile, but that didn't make things any easier on me. Actually, it scared me out of my wits, because if Oakfur's unhappy with the way I behave towards him, he could probably get me kicked out of ShadowClan! So I've got to act like I'm thrilled about this arrangement that stupid Blackstar set up. The plain _idea_ repulses me since he's so much older than I am, and in the first place I've never wanted to have kits.I know he's respected and all, but I don't understand why - I certainly don't love him, but now I've got to act like it. And the thing that irritates me the most is that Oakfur never even said hi or anything, when I got there he just started carrying out Blackstar's orders like a mindless robot. When it was finally over, he just took off! And then this morning, when I was talking with Rowanclaw, Oakfur came over and wrapped his tail around my waist like the most loving mate ever. It's _weird!_

Birchfeather's simple to figure out. I know he isn't taking advantage of me; he never would do something like that. If he knew about Oakfur he'd flip off the walls. I know that Birchfeather loves me back, ThunderClan or not, and we can just have casual conversations if we please. And I love that about him!

Birchfeather also isn't about mating like crazy, but I think Oakfur is.

And so obviously I couldn't meet Birchfeather last night, since I was with Oakfur, but I'll meet him today. Sundown, at the fallen maple. We agreed long ago that if one of us couldn't make it to a meeting at all, to try again the next day. And if by the third day we haven't both shown up, that we need to forget that meeting; the next one should happen by chance. So by that theory, with any luck I should meet Birchfeather there tonight.

-x-

When I pad into the clearing, I've got a different story ready. I still think Birchfeather would flip if he found out about Oakfur and I, so I'm going to tell him I was on patrol. Birchfeather's amber eyes watch me unblinkingly as I weave my tale. "I'm _really_ sorry, Birchfeather. At the last minute, Russetfur assigned me to patrol in place of Smokestream. He'd shown up with a thorn in his pad." I nonverbally plead with Birchfeather to accept my story.

His expression clears. "How could I be mad at you, Applenose?" He purrs, whiskers twitching. "How're things in ShadowClan?"

Instantly, I'm on my guard. I try to keep my voice lighthearted as I reply, "We're good. Snowstep's expected to have one or two kits, and Smokestream's crazy with pride. Toadpaw, Ivypaw, and Marshpaw became warriors; now they're Marshtail, Toadheart, and Ivylight. How's ThunderClan?" He comes over to my side, and I notice that his fur smells strongly of Whiteflower. Again, I'm on my guard for him to mention her name.

"ThunderClan's fine," Birchfeather begins, lying down on the leaf litter. "Berrykit, Mousekit, and Hazelkit were just apprenticed. Berrykit is being mentored by Brambleclaw, Hazelkit's got Dustpelt to train her, and Mousepaw is Spiderleg's first apprentice, so he's happy. Whiteflower and I-" _there._ I catch her name. "caught a trace of WindClan on patrol today, but since it was near the stream Firestar thinks an apprentice just fell in, nothing hostile."

"Who else was on the patrol?" I ask, taking care to make sure I don't sound threatening. _I'll bet just she and him._

"Just us," he replies, tail twitching a bit. He doesn't meet my eyes, but busies himself twining my tail and his. When he looks up to notice my darkened face, he murmurs, "Applenose, that doesn't mean I love her."

I lie down on the leaf litter beside him. "I love you," he says.

After a short silence, I say, "Me too." And I really, really mean it.

Night surrounds us by the time he says something again, but the silence felt natural, not at all stiff or awkward. "Do you remember," Birchfeather meows, "that night, the first meeting we had by chance?"

I lean into his comforting build as I add, "The night we vowed to love each other forever?" But I've purposely left one important bit off, and I want to see if he'll remember it.

"Across the borders," he finally whispers.

And all of the sudden it's happening again; the thing that makes us traitors to our Clans in the first place, but this time it'll be alright, it'll be okay, because we're together.

**--Rainey/**


	11. Cold

This line is going to repeat and IDK why

**This line is going to repeat and IDK why XP**

**Qzil - I'd update For Real except that I've got a block towards it tonight. I might be over it by tomorrow.**

**Foxstar24 - a lil opinionated, are we? Hmmmm… don't worry, I'm just kidding since I agree with -most- of what you said.**

**All The Stars In The Sky - thank you! Here's your update :)**

Across the Borders, Chapter 11

**by**:_ rainfeather's hope_

"I've got to go," I tell Applenose. "In four days, meet at the Twoleg path?" She ndos drowsily, and I lick her forehead before taking off. Prior to entering ThunderClan territory, I stop and hurriedly wash her scent off my fur. That quickly proves to have been the right thing to do, for I meet Whiteflower nearly as soon as my paws touch ThunderClan soil.

"Where have you been?" she growls. "I had to cover for you, so you owe me!"

"I had to get away," I tell her. "A ton of the cats keep asking if we're mates." _That_ is_ true. _"Can you keep it on the D.L? That we are?"

"I haven't told any cat!" Whiteflower sounds bewildered and hurt. I try to soothe her by licking her ear, but she swipes at me. "You know what? You _smell of Applenose!"_

I recoil like she's bit me. "I - I-"

"No, don't try lying to me! You've been with her, her, that ShadowClan female, and…"

"We're just friends, Whiteflower!" I say desperately. This tangled web of lies is getting harder and harder to sustain. "I was asking her opinion about how to make the toms shut up about you and me!" I improvise wildly.

The suspicion in her eyes doesn't fade, not a bit, but she stops theorizing and looks at me hard. "Just friends, friends and nothing more?"

"Yes," I lie, my fear beginning to build up inside me.

"I'm not saying I believe you, but I'll try to put it out of my mind. And if I catch her scent on you often, you'd better believe it'll be all heck breaking loose, Birchfeather. Cats don't lie to me, because I'll tell you straight up - I won't tolerate it." She looks as steely as Bluestar did, two nights ago. "We may be mates but that doesn't mean I'm going to sit pretty and drool all over you, no matter what you do."

"I know, I know. It won't happen again," I promise my mate. She looks temporarily appeased. "I've got to get back to camp now," I say. "Before anymore of our Clanmates get suspicious."

She lets me pass, wariness apparent in every hair of her pelt. _She doesn't quite believe me. I'll have to watch my step from now on,_ I think.

My heart belongs to two she-cats, one not of my Clan, StarClan has promised vengeance against me, and I don't know who I can trust with my story. Oh yeah, life is _great._

-x-(one. moon. later. birch. pov) -x- 

Whiteflower and I have gotten closer, while Applenose and I haven't been able to meet for a moon. I'm always busy on patrol since I don't have an apprentice, and Applenose always was occupied with her duties. ShadowClan have way fewer cats than ThunderClan. Also, I wasn't at the Gathering a quarter-moon ago. Spiderleg did tell me, grudgingly, that Snowstep has had two kits. I think he said their names were Stripekit and Skykit.

Spiderleg still hasn't forgiven me for the Whiteflower thing. Word, aka _gossip_, flies fast around here.

StarClan still show no sign of punishing either Applenose or I for what we've done. I'm not afraid any longer; on the contrary, I wish we could meet more often. I _miss_ being able to meet frequently with Applenose. I think I'll check the border for her tonight… possibly in just a few hours. In the meantime, I'll catch up on sleep. I took dawn patrol and sundown patrol today.

-x-

Twilight envelops the lakeside. Whiteflower's just fallen asleep, and I've already snuck away from the den.

"Hi Ashfur," I greet my former mentor. "I fancy a bit of night hunting. Would you mind telling Firestar if he asks?"

"No problem, Birchfeather," he replies, a tad sleepily. _Home free._

Cold air slices through my thin pelt. A three quarter moon, waning, shines through the sky. A clump of clouds soon obscures its brightness, dying the snow a darker tint. Leaf-bare truly has hit, but no one in ThunderClan will be kept down. With all this frosty glitter carpeting the lake, cats and prey should be easy to spot tonight.

I weave through hickory and cedar trees, then pass a walnut. My ears are alert and my eyes are searching for any sign of any living creature, be it ThunderClan, ShadowClan, or prey. A rabbit soon appears from its hole and I chase after it, my hind paws kicking up puffs of snow as I go. With a flying leap to make SkyClan proud, I tackle the hare and with a single claw I cut its throat. I bury my prey under a hickory tree and keep on searching. I take out a squirrel soon after and hide it back with the rabbit.

I've crept up on a robin, and I pounce on it just when a low moan catches my attention. It's coming from the other side of this border I've been traveling. The wind is howling away from me, so I can't scent the cats. While I'm distracted, the robin pulls its wing free and flutters away from me. As I stare after it despairingly, the clouds covering the moon fragment. I recognize two ShadowClan cats by moonlight, and all of the sudden even my heart feels cold. Oakfur's with Applenose, and she's moaning wildly beneath him. Her paws work the empty air as Oakfur continues.

I don't believe this. _How could Applenose be so cold?_ It's right in front of my nose, and I don't believe it.

Oakfur's attention is all centered on Applenose, whose eyes are shut. He's grinning down at her; I could yowl my heart out and I doubt he'd notice.

Suddenly her eyes open, and lock onto mine in horror. I stare icily at her. This is the deepest betrayal I've ever known.

_You and Whiteflower did the same. _

I do not have the strength to deal with my conscience right now. I can't think straight. I weave around as if in a drunken stupor, unable to see anything but that horrible image I just witnessed. Finally I collapse into some stream. The water rushes over my head, nearly frozen. Everything blurs, and water fills my ears. At last I am rid of the awful image.

"Birchfeather! Hey, Birchfeather? What do you think you're doing?" The voice, though seriously muted, is recognizable as Leafpool's.

I feel pain like teeth around ground into my scruff; I am dimly aware of tugging on my fur. But all I know is I'm _cold. _So bitterly _cold…_

**Before I get some PMs and crazy reviews yelling, "ohmegee you killt birchie11!1eleven!," he isn't suicidal; he's just so shocked he has no idea what he's doing. He's basically a danger to himself at this point in time. And **_**yea**_** Leafpool found him. He lives. **

**--Rainey/**


	12. Always

**Okay, so you don't want an epilogue, I totally get you.**

**Reader (this is your cue): -death dagger glares-**

**Oh wait, maybe I got some reviews. -eyes pop out of head- Alright okee YOU WANT AN EPILOGUE!! DON'T KILL ME!!**

**I'm presenting this last chapter; it's dedicated to all of you who've read the story, whether or not you reviewed. Although thank you very much for leaving your mark on my story. AtB is the first multi-chaptered story I've completed.**

Across the Borders, Chapter 12 

**by**: _rainfeather's hope_

"_**Always"**_

I lay on the ground, trembling, as Oakfur's attacks on me cease. He purrs darkly and leans over to nip me on the ear; I'm not looking at him. "Well, my darling, was it good?" My ear burns where his tongue touched it, and I resent the fact that he does this whenever he pleases. Blankly, I nod. Honestly, I'm afraid he hurt the kits. But I have to pretend that I love him, or I fear he will strike me or have me exiled.

I'm about one moon along in my pregnancy and like Snowstep I'm unsure whose kits I will be bearing, Birchfeather's or Oakfur's. I haven't been able to meet with Birchfeather since the last time, when we mated, so he has no idea of my pregnancy, although it's becoming very obvious. I do dream of the kits being Birchfeather's.

I also hope that I imagined seeing him tonight. It was at the beginning of dusk, shortly after I'd realized Oakfur had different intentions for bringing me out here than I had imagined. Out of fear I always act blissful when Oakfur touches me, so I was moaning in this moonstruck kind of way, pretty loudly. Then I thought I heard a bird fly away, so I opened my eyes and locked onto his. Birchfeather's eyes were like ice shards lodging themselves in my heart.

_You should've told him,_ the voice in my head taunts.

What will he say?

-x-(apple. pov. two. nights. later.)-x-

_Birchfeather is near. _I'm crouching on one of the uppermost branches of a maple tree, casting my eyes around relentlessly for any sign of that tabby pelt. His scent floods my senses; I just hope he's alone. When he appears I scramble down from the tree and land on his back squarely. "Birchfeather!" I hiss as he opens his mouth to yowl for his Clan. His ears prick up, but his face stays stony.

"I guess we need to talk." He turns decidedly away from me as he speaks.

I uneasily meet his eyes. "Maybe we should go somewhere private," I finally suggest.

Something flickers in his unreadable expression, but he doesn't reply and follows me yet again to the fallen maple. Leaf-bare has coated the fallen glory, and no leaves remain on any tree near. Birchfeather paces the ground agitatedly; when I try to lay my tail on his shoulder in comfort he hisses at me. Nervously I draw back. "You saw me - but wait, wait - I can explain-" As the words leave my mouth I am uncomfortably aware of how guilty I sound.

Birchfeather's voice explodes into an outraged yowl. "Explain, _explain_?! You said you _loved_ me, and then I saw you allowing that… that _Oakfur_ to touch you and take my place and you weren't fighting or crying; no, no, you were _enjoying _it! Don't _look _at me like that! Great StarClan, Applenose - I love you, I always have and I probably always will! But I can't _always _meet you in secret, can't _always_ be wondering if you're cheating on me with Smokestream or Oakfur or who_ever_… I can't _do_ it, Applenose, I just _can't_. I've got Whiteflower now and you've got Oakfur, and … however much I want to, I just _can't_ cross borders for you anymore. I'll always want to… but I just… but I just _can't_." His voice falls off, softening, emotion filling ever syllable.

My vision is blurry, and when I focus it I'm in time to whisper, "Birchfeather."

He turns around, his amber eyes glowing with more love than boundaries could ever contain. Then he was gone, _gone,_ just like that.

"Birchfeather-" My voice cracks in the empty forest, and I am overwhelmed by my sense of solitude. "I never told you… I'm expecting kits…"


	13. Epilogue

Across the Borders, Epilogue

**by**: _rainfeather's hope_

(apple. pov. - about two weeks later)

_I screech loudly, feeling as though my insides are being knotted and run over by some Thunderpath monster. This is the most physical pain I've ever known._

Everything's a blur to me from then on. Littlecloud says I had a relatively easy birth and that I should consider myself lucky.

There's no doubt in my mind that the kits are actually Birchfeather's. I have Duskkit, a tiny female with my green eyes and Marshtail's gray pelt. I suppose it runs in our lineage. There's Redkit, a male tortoiseshell whose fur is red-tipped. And then there' a tabby tom, with light brown fur, just a _shade_ lighter than Oakfur's.

And my little kit's eyes are amber, not that hateful hazel.

His name is Maplekit. For our meeting place.

Birchfeather and I may have had to give each other up, but there's still a connection. I believe our love will always stretch across the borders.

* * *

**(takes huge breath) Oh StarClan I hope you like this. I redid it twice. Please review, I really want to know what you think.**

**Completed Saturday, March 29, 2008; the first multi-chapter story I've ever written.**

**--Rainey/**


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